Sorry, but with the state of all the truly oppressed of the world weighing on my conscience daily I can't bring myself to support raver's rights. Seems silly. C'mon, what have these baggy-panted, Day-Glo, Ecstasy-shriveled zealots done for the global village? How have they contributed to the advance of civilization? How many (expletive) soundtracks is the Crystal Method going to appear on?

Only 10 shopping days to Halloween, kids. In the meantime, enjoy the Passenger's pithy little pop culture report, penned by my lunatic right hand. Carter is good. Carter is your friend. Carter loves you. Peace out, dammit.
 

"In the world there are espresso drinkers and there are other people. In Italy, we are espresso drinkers. Americans are the other people." So declares Andrea Illy - grandson of Francesco Illy, inventor of the modern espresso maker - in the latest issue of The New Yorker. Nessuna domanda, Illy knows his joe - as president of Illycaffe´, the supreme espresso roaster of Italy, he's been on both sides of the counter. Illycaffe´'s official site gently touts the talent and skill the company has put into its beverage since 1933, while educating the neophyte (meaning: America) on the bean's finer points. Trace coffee back to its point of origin; break the elixir down its base chemistry; enjoy its pleasant side effects. And once you've achieved enlightenment, take Illy's personality test and find out how the nectar has shaped you. At the very least, your re-education will compel you to cut down on your milk intake - a substance Andrea Illy described as anathema to everything good coffee should be. What do we know?
 

Not a pop culture site per se, but let's face it, if you can't sleep at night, how are you going to stay awake for the good stuff? SleepNet exists to help the 50 million Americans afflicted with sleep disorders by providing a comprehensive guide to sleep information on the net. Whether you're experiencing strange or upsetting dreams, insomnia, restless legs or any other condition that deprives you of the shuteye you deserve, SleepNet can point you decisively back in the direction of the Land of Dreams. Wait up for me - hopefully I'll be along shortly.
 

Don Knotts is a genius! White Castle hamburgers are the food of poetry! Computer skullduggery is running riot in Belgium! One man's roadside junk is another's high art! Barbie is a ripe target for intergalactic sexual harassment! Rarely have I had such unabashed good fun sifting through kitsch as I have hitting the highs and lows of William Swislow's Interesting Ideas site, a textbook example of truth in advertising. These are the true pinnacles of human achievement, from Chicago's little-known "Back Street Bauhaus" to the pre-Seinfeld comic innovations of the Dick Van Dyke show. A terrific set of essays, illustrations and - yes, indeedy - interesting ideas.